This is apparently for real and I am the VERY FIRST person to win this sweepstakes.  Remember back at the turn of the millennium when I said "first" customers provide good PR opportunities.  Well....

Here is what occurred:

Step 1
On January 19, DrugEmporium.com earned a Brucie for service performed when I was placing an order.

Step 2
For the same order, DrugEmporium.com earned a Noosie for poor service on the fulfillment.

Step 3
I sent an email to DrugEmporium.com's customer service telling them of my dissatisfaction.  An excerpt from this email:  "...You'll need to come up with something good to make up for this and have any hope of retaining me as a customer...Promising me free next day delivery in the future has no value to me.  You need to offer me something pretty good to retain me as a customer.

Step 4
Over one week passes without a response from DrugEmporium.com

Step 5
At 2:57pm on January 31 (Monday), I receive an email informing me that I am the very first winner of the DrugEmporium.com $1000 Giveaway Sweepstakes.  Amy figures out how to spend the money in less than 3.8 seconds.

Step 6
At 5:40pm on January 31 (Monday), I received an email from DrugEmporium.com's customer service.  It read as follows:

Dear Mr. Weinberg,

Thank you for your recent e-mail.  It is disappointing to learn of the inconvenience you encountered recently with DrugEmporium.com.  Please accept our sincere apologies for any frustration. 

It is our goal to make each of your visits to DrugEmporium.com a pleasant one.  We work hard to provide all our customers with a time and money-saving solution to their personal and healthcare needs.  We value your feedback and view it as an opportunity to improve our many services.

Please give us the opportunity to make it up to you.  Use the following $10 coupon code towards your next purchase with DrugEmporium.com.  To receive the $10 coupon, please shop at http://www.drugemporium.com.  Then go to Checkout and enter the Coupon Savings Code 
(I've suppressed the code) in the Coupon Savings Information field.  $10 will then be deducted from your total order amount.  This coupon cannot be used towards pharmaceutical items, delivery charges, or combined with any other DrugEmporium.com discounts or offers. 

We hope you will grant DrugEmporium.com another chance to serve you in the near future.  Please e-mail us at customerservice@deservice.com or call toll-free at 1-877-DRUG411 (1-877-378-4411) with any questions or concerns.  Our Customer Care Specialists are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for your shopping convenience.  Thanks again for sharing your experience with us. 

Sincerely,

(I have withheld the name)
Customer Care Specialist
DrugEmporium.com - Your total health and wellness solution
http://www.DrugEmporium.com

Step 7
The cynic in me emerges and wonders whether the sequence of these events is purely coincidental.

Step 8
I speak with employees of DrugEmporium.com and, in the end, I believe that the sweepstakes winning was an independent event.

Step 9
Providing me with the sweepstakes is definitely deserving of a Brucie; I am ecstatic about that and I am thankful to DrugEmporium.com.  Customer service's response to my complaint, however, is no where near satisfactory.  In fact, it deserves a Noosie.  It took them ten (10) days to get back to me; and then, they offer me $10, which can not go toward shipping.

Step 10
When talking with an employee of DrugEmporium.com about the sweepstakes, I mentioned that fulfillment for two consecutive orders was below par, and I asked about their typical fulfillment performance.  This person told me that their fulfillment is typically very good and it is yet another coincidence that I experienced two slow orders (my words) in a row.

I am going to use the coupon code for research purposes and place another order.  If the fulfillment is poor, then DrugEmporium will earn a lifetime Noosie award (I know, some of you are going to say that I should increase my sample size).  If the fulfillment is fair or better, then I will have some evidence to suggest that I may have had some bad luck of the draw and that DrugEmporium.com deserves, perhaps, some benefit of the doubt.

The 19th hole
For some of you cynics out there, this experience raises the fascinating issue of customer acquisition costs.  Let's analyze the implications of acquiring a loyal customer for $1,000 (which I am not saying was the case in my situation).

Let's assume that a package of diapers cost them $5.00 and has a selling price of $8.00.  Assume that by acquiring me as a customer, I will buy one package of diapers per week for as long as at least one of my children is wearing diapers.  Their break-even would then be 334 packages of diapers [$1,000/($8.00-$5.00) -- note that this excludes other variable costs associated with selling a package of diapers; therefore, this analysis assumes a best case scenario.]  It would take me 6 years and 22 weeks to purchase that many diapers.

Assuming that Sam will be in diapers for another year and that the new baby will be in diapers for three years, DrugEmporium.com would still need for me to buy 2+ years worth of diapers in order for them to break-even.  Sorry DrugEmporium.com, I'm shutting down the spigot after number three shows herself or himself to the world.  DrugEmporium would need to turn me onto other items that they sell or convince me that four children can be a lot of fun.  If they made me the super-duper grand prize winner of another sweepstakes and the prize was a Lexus LX470 or a Toyota LandCruiser, then  I would definitely consider going for number four.  Were this to happen, I would buy another 3 years worth of diapers and DrugEmporium.com would have made money by acquiring me as a customer.  (Hey, finance gurus, please don't ruin the story by raising issues about ROI and other financial yardsticks.)

Oh, I would get Toyota to donate a vehicle in exchange for promotional considerations.  This way, DrugEmporium would not realize any promotion related expenses.
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